I’m very well aware at this point that this blog is just for me. I put my thoughts out there, and if someone reads them, I hope they can relate. If not, I get all of my words somewhere.
I’ve always put a lot of pressure on myself to be perfect, to post every day, to journal every day. Anything “every day” leaves a lot of room for mistakes and stress. I know myself and I know I am very vulnerable to stress. I am willing to admit that I am a stress-driven perfectionist. It’s not a bad thing to be someone who cares about doing it right, but it isn’t good to let this pressure flow into the relationships and more carefree parts of your life.
I honestly have to thank my parents and friends for helping me along this journey. I recently have been breaking down walls in my life. I love to follow the rules, to do everything right. I had a lot of religious anxiety about messing up, saying the right thing, and I beat myself up for every sin. I know everyone judges someone at some point. I just can’t let the view of others impact the way I feel about myself; God doesn’t see me the same way my peers do.